Don't want to be left behind when the rapture arrives? Want to make sure you float up to heaven naked with Bush, Ashcroft, Cheney, Wolfowitz and Perle? Well, now you can be better prepared, courtesy Verizon Wireless:
| You've read the series. You wonder what it means to your life. Now you want to access the prophecies that speak the truth when you need them. Left Behind Mobile Prophecies is the first ever mobile scriptures reference tool that you can download to your phone. Check it every day to review Prophecies, read Devotional quotes, and get inspired by the Discussions. What's more, you can save your favorites in the Bookmark section to review them later or share with friends. Airtime required for use. |
All that for only $3.75 - $4.25 per month, depending on your cell phone model. Such a deal! I mean, name one person who wouldn't want to spend eternity with a naked Dick Cheney. Well, okay then, name another. Well then, just forget the whole thing if you're going to be that way about it.
Now, if you want to get more down-to-earth life-saving use out of your cell phone, then maybe Nokia should be your brand of choice:
| ...."I heard a 'doof-doof' sound and one of my colleagues shouted 'they are shooting at us!' Alongside the truck was a bright red car with a man hanging out the window. I saw a flash and after the second shot I felt a pain in my hand," Daily Dispatch reported him recounting his story. The bullet entered Steyn's hand and came out the other side and was stopped by his mobile phone before it could enter his temple and kill him. Steyn swerved his truck, and forced the potential hijacker’s car over two lanes onto an embankment on the side of the road. "At least I know who my angel is: it must be Nokia," Steyn said at the time. The attackers managed to get their car back to the road and escape.... |
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